Friday, February 22, 2013

Happy 2nd Birthday Aidyn James


Aidyn James,

Today you are TWO years old! I have never been so in awe of anything as I am of watching you grow up. Every morning I am amazed at how much you seem to have sprouted up again over night, you are growing like a wild weed. In so many ways I love seeing you grow and change, but there are moments when I want to freeze time and keep you my sweet baby boy forever. Aidyn James, your heart is so precious and kind. Not a moment goes by when you are not spreading joy and giving energy to everyone around you; your spirit is contagious and a cure for any of life’s stress or burden. And your laugh, my favorite sound in all my life, is constantly echoing around the house. We know if it gets quiet, something’s up. You run wildly around this house, squealing with discovery and delight, making a mess whenever you can. Sometimes your Daddy and I make eye contact and share a silent moment of pride and adoration of the little boy we see becoming ever more independent and ambitious.

You are a getting to be a big boy Aidyn James. But my heart stops every time you stumble or fall (which is A LOT, you have no fear. Example: When you climbed from your crib on top of your changing table.. little turd.). Daddy keeps telling me I have to stop being so nervous about you hurting yourself, but I know he is just as nervous as I am.  Your first year of life was all about taking care of you and meeting your every need, you were so helpless and innocent. This second year I’ve had to step back, just a bit, and let you learn some things on your own, and it’s been challenging not to jump in and do everything for you like I’ve always done. But, Aidyn, you have surpassed every expectation. You are so thoughtful and determined.

Now we do sometimes have issues…. You have a serious case of toddler ‘tude. You like to say “No, no, no” when you don’t want to do something we want you to do. I know you’re just testing out the world a little bit, trying to find your own sense of control over the little things, so I cut you some slack sometimes. But not always. You have to go to sleep at some point. And brush your teeth. And we have to change your stinkbutt diapers. Despite the no, no stage I am the luckiest and proudest mom of the most beautiful and hilarious two-year-old. Everything I do in life, I do for you. There will be times in your life that you will probably hate me for nudging you or keeping you from doing something you want but please know that I have the best intentions; my job as your mom is to protect you and keep you safe.

There are times that you make me feel so treasured. Like you and I are the only two people in the world. When we are snuggling in bed lying nose to nose.The way you pet my hair or rub the tips of my fingers as I'm rocking you to sleep. It is one of the best feelings I have ever experienced. It is love in its most purest and honest form.

I am so proud of the little boy you are becoming. You are sometimes serious and other times silly. You are busy and full of energy. You are lovable and snugglable. You are your own unique little self. I love every bit and detail about you peanut!


Happy second birthday to my world, my beautiful baby boy—I love you more than you’ll ever truly know.
I will love you Always and Forever,

Nany
 
 
 

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Hello & Goodbye ~ Change

2012.

A year of unconditional love, almost unbearable heartaches, uncontrollable laughter, small mistakes, big dreams, and very little change.

Looking back on the past year, I have realized that I am stuck in quite the rut.

I remember being asked five years ago, right around the time of my high school graduation, where I thought I would be in life five years down the road. I remember thinking and hoping that I would have graduated from college, have found a wonderful job, maybe be in love with a wonderful man, but I am far from those predictions.

I don't hate my life. Far from hate. But I do know that I want 2013 to bring many changes.

I also know that if I want things to change, I have to take control of my life. I have been relying on others, listening to their thoughts and opinions not my own. I'm going to take risks, do things that I have been so terribly afraid of doing for far too long.

It is time for me to stop worrying about what others might think. I focus too much on trying not to disappoint other people, when in reality I disappoint myself trying to make them happy.

I know that when the clock struck midnight on Tuesday my life didn't instantaneously change. I know that in 2013 I am going to have to work my butt off for what I want. I'm going to struggle, but I know that struggle leads to success. I refuse to let myself sink into this darkness that is slowly consuming me.

Most importantly, this year gives me 365 more days to watch my favorite little boy grow, and learn, and discover this beautiful world that I have lost touch with. I hope that I can learn to love the little things again right along with him. The little things are sometimes the most important.


Resolution: Make myself happy. Like I said above. This year is about me. (And Aidyn of course!)

I can't wait to see where I take myself in 2013. I am going to do big things.

I've had my share of difficult moments this past year.... But I have also made some incredible memories!

My best friends wedding, KFL, 50th wedding anniversary, Christmas, A Hero's Homecoming, memories with my little angel, a first birthday, spending times with my family, visiting old friends, show me your muscles & so much more. I am thankful for what I learned this past year, and thankful that I can make steps to a better New Year!!

Wishing each of you a happy, healthy 2013!


 Cheers & Love

         SGK